tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-56751526929462650752024-03-05T18:01:53.854+00:00The perfect storm.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-44782900068778630212010-03-12T15:13:00.004+00:002010-03-12T16:35:10.777+00:00NEVER under estimate the power of plastic!!<div style="text-align: justify;"></div><div style="text-align: right;"></div><div style="text-align: left;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>Recently another Autie mommy pondered on the question of friend or stranger, would this person have frowned on her child's tantrums or offered her the hand of friendship? I assume that all people frown on my children's behaviour as we get many a dissaproving stare when out in public such as the dreaded one below.<br />
<br />
<div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGrvfX_CBzmX_YNKVIjYG6qmqnAF4zxVpRCPt0NX4LeV3CmR9KZUEvEo5BRfnOlXxKvWc4Fu2FUcZC6GlaTYFpuGQdjqRgIhiUGinYmfWwYVIV3NRXgScpZS8Pa6yu80k4zzMWKO8Ef0E/s1600-h/imagesCAY1SPU7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGrvfX_CBzmX_YNKVIjYG6qmqnAF4zxVpRCPt0NX4LeV3CmR9KZUEvEo5BRfnOlXxKvWc4Fu2FUcZC6GlaTYFpuGQdjqRgIhiUGinYmfWwYVIV3NRXgScpZS8Pa6yu80k4zzMWKO8Ef0E/s320/imagesCAY1SPU7.jpg" vt="true" width="232" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">I am sure I am not alone in getting these looks from strangers who have absolutely no idea what it is like to live in our shoes, we all know the look, its feels like daggers between the shoulder blades and you feel the panic rise up inside you and think 'God I have to get out of here now or I will scream'!! One such incident happened to me about a week or so ago when my affore mentioned little darling decided to throw one hell of a tantrum in Lidl's and proceeded to end up on the floor just at the checkout, bless him!!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3is5x4wTB6hRslqJos4wnJADZ-BQGmhHKAxLXUkS6wEz3uDyqEIydBlveCtfiLHS08SWtWVLLj7-NHWqOXEgf5hS4A1jrgsHTbspCsv0DxtNIrmTxA7O0hw0vfAhOGnbbXpJ98MQ9Jl0/s1600-h/imagesCAALG1TM.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3is5x4wTB6hRslqJos4wnJADZ-BQGmhHKAxLXUkS6wEz3uDyqEIydBlveCtfiLHS08SWtWVLLj7-NHWqOXEgf5hS4A1jrgsHTbspCsv0DxtNIrmTxA7O0hw0vfAhOGnbbXpJ98MQ9Jl0/s400/imagesCAALG1TM.jpg" vt="true" width="360" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">Within minutes the lady in front of me gave me the most withering stare possible and I wanted the ground to open me up and swallow me but then I remembered I had in my possession my flexible little friend which I had acquired only the week before and my palpitations and panic lessoned as I suddenly knew what to do with my new found friend, you see the powerful piece of plastic I had acquired was the IAA card and this was the perfect opportunity to give it the first airing out of my purse, so I smiled sweetly at the scowling vision before me and calmly pressed the card into her hand, a look of embarrassment spread across her face and a glow of crimson started at her neck and spread quickly to her cheeks until I am sure her face felt as if it was on fire, she now understood the panic I felt when people like her make assumptions and think I have a badly behaved child. I took back the card without even uttering one word to this woman and calmly got my groceries and marched out head held high, the sense of power that one little plastic card gave me that day was amazing and it saved me from having to converse with the scarlet woman and gave me back my dignity. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQEvSKjTjL-BayfQlIBzs0ExcWuwH0w1yQaGGZNM7KdK_sQmBOr9boPqAAe-ga0-4SpvvLju1vMsmc7K4H-FrhTcNq2BWqSvtO78QXm5DNEGIUon4beeIO6gAghbiQuxDr1zGquB3qSG8/s1600-h/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="147" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQEvSKjTjL-BayfQlIBzs0ExcWuwH0w1yQaGGZNM7KdK_sQmBOr9boPqAAe-ga0-4SpvvLju1vMsmc7K4H-FrhTcNq2BWqSvtO78QXm5DNEGIUon4beeIO6gAghbiQuxDr1zGquB3qSG8/s320/images.jpg" vt="true" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">To all other parents with children with Autism I would urge you to get this card for your child, it will be the most important card in your wallet, it is my new found friend and a life saver when panic strikes and you want to preserve your dignity</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-50510155521276764342010-03-04T19:54:00.000+00:002010-03-04T19:54:56.177+00:00My 99 things<b>Started your own blog </b>. Em you are looking at it!!<b></b><br />
<br />
<b>Slept under the stars</b><br />
<br />
Played in a band<br />
<br />
Visited Hawaii<br />
<br />
Watched a meteor shower<br />
<br />
<b>Given more than you can afford to charity</b> several times.<br />
<br />
<b>Been to Disneyland </b> second trip coming up soon :)<br />
<br />
<b>Climbed a mountain</b> Croagh Patrick.<br />
<br />
Held a praying mantis<br />
<br />
<b>Sang a solo</b> Several solo's actually in school and other variety performances, not the royal one though lol<br />
<br />
Bungee jumped<br />
<br />
<b>Visited Paris </b> Several times as I am in love with the place!<br />
<br />
<b>Watched a lightening storm </b> Yep watched a right doozy of a one in Florida on my honeymoon.<br />
<br />
Taught yourself a art from scratch.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Adopted a child <br />
<br />
<b>Had food poisoning</b>. Who hasn't<br />
<br />
<b>Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty</b> Didn't actually walk to the top but did walk into the lift !!<br />
<br />
Grown your own vegetables <br />
<br />
<b>Seen the Mona Lisa in France</b><br />
<br />
Slept on an overnight train<br />
<br />
<b>Had a pillow fight</b><br />
<br />
Hitch hiked<br />
<br />
<b>Taken a sick day when you’re not ill</b><br />
<br />
<b>Built a snow fort</b>In the bad snow in the eighties did this.<br />
<br />
<b>Held a lamb</b> We had two lambs who lived in our garden when we were children for a while and one morning we woke up and they were gone, they were duly found in little pieces in the freezer!! Have never eaten lamb to this day since that discovery.<br />
<br />
<b>Gone skinny dipping</b>Unfortunately yes I have in Majorca on a wild girls holiday, swam out into the bay and got promptly stung on the leg by a jellyfish!!<br />
<br />
Run a Marathon<br />
<br />
Ridden in a gondola in Venice<br />
<br />
Seen a total eclipse<br />
<br />
Watched a sunrise or sunset<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Hit a home run<br />
<br />
Been on a cruise<br />
<br />
Seen Niagara Falls in person<br />
<br />
<b>Visited the birthplace of your ancestors</b> Kilkenny<br />
<br />
Seen an Amish community<br />
<br />
Taught yourself a new language <br />
<br />
Had enough money to be truly satisfied<br />
<br />
Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person<br />
<br />
Gone rock climbing<br />
<br />
Seen Michelangelo’s David<br />
<br />
<b>Sung karaoke</b><br />
<br />
Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt<br />
<br />
Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant<br />
<br />
Visited Africa Egypt - wow!!!<br />
<br />
<b>Walked on a beach by moonlight</b> Several times :)<br />
<br />
<b>Been transported by ambulance</b> Several trips unfortunately:(<br />
<br />
Had your portrait painted <br />
<br />
Gone deep sea fishing<br />
<br />
Seen the Sistine Chapel in person<br />
<br />
<b>Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris</b><br />
<br />
Gone scuba diving or snorkeling<br />
<br />
<b>Kissed in the rain </b><br />
<br />
Played in the mud<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Gone to a drive-in theater<br />
<br />
Been in a movie<br />
<br />
Visited the Great Wall of China<br />
<br />
Started a business<br />
<br />
Taken a martial arts class<br />
<br />
Visited Russia<br />
<br />
Served at a soup kitchen<br />
<br />
Sold Girl Scout Cookies<br />
<br />
Gone whale watching<br />
<br />
<b>Got flowers for no reason</b><br />
<br />
Donated blood, platelets or plasma<br />
<br />
Gone sky diving<br />
<br />
Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp<br />
<br />
Bounced a check<br />
<br />
Flown in a helicopter<br />
<br />
Saved a favorite childhood toy<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Visited the Lincoln Memorial<br />
<br />
Eaten Caviar<br />
<br />
Pieced a quilt<br />
<br />
<b>Stood in Times Square</b> Did this just before Xmas<br />
<br />
Toured the Everglades<br />
<br />
<b>Been fired from a job</b> Yes but only because I wouldn't have a relationship with my then boss, he claimed I was being made redundant!!<br />
<br />
Seen the Changing of the Guards in London <br />
<br />
<b>Broken a bone</b> Technically its not a bone but I did break my elbow after falling down the stairs, I was carrying a basket of washing down and slipped and went flying, when my hubbie found me I had a pair of knickers on my head and he peed himself laughing!!<br />
<br />
Been a passenger on a motorcycle<br />
<br />
Seen the Grand Canyon in person<br />
<br />
Published a book<br />
<br />
Visited the Vatican<br />
<br />
Bought a brand new car<br />
<br />
Walked in Jerusalem<br />
<br />
<b>Had your picture in the newspaper</b> Yes was involved in a march to the Dept of Environment in relation to dumping of waste in our locality and ended up in the Independent:)<br />
<br />
Kissed a stranger at midnight on New Year’s Eve<br />
<br />
Visited the White House<br />
<br />
Killed and prepared an animal for eating<br />
<br />
<b>Had chickenpox </b><br />
<br />
Saved someone’s life <br />
<br />
Sat on a jury<br />
<br />
Met someone famous <br />
<br />
Joined a book club<br />
<br />
Got a tattoo<br />
<br />
<b>Had a baby</b> Two actually!<br />
<br />
Seen the Alamo in person<br />
<br />
Swam in the Great Salt Lake<br />
<br />
<b>Been involved in a law suit</b> 3 to date!<br />
<br />
<b>Owned a cell phone</b><br />
<br />
<b>Been stung by a bee</b><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Posted by Taz at 2:49 PMUnknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-20905019506356143072010-03-04T12:31:00.002+00:002010-03-04T13:13:21.605+00:00Thursday, March 4, 2010<br />
Abacus Drogheda Needs Your Vote: in the AIB Better Ireland <br />
<br />
Abacus Parents Assocation is working everyday to maintain the additional services which are essential to the most effective intervention for our kids.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Abacus Drogheda is in the final 3 for the AIB Better Ireland grant scheme.<br />
<br />
The group who comes 3rd gets €2,000,<br />
<br />
2nd Place will get €3,000<br />
<br />
But If we win we get €5,000 !!!<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
You can help simply by Texting:<br />
<br />
<br />
DROGHED-B to 51303 as many times as you can. And by telling everyone you know to do it too.<br />
Texts are charged at the standard text rate<br />
<br />
Go to: http://www.betterireland.ie/vote.html<br />
<br />
And then select: Louth in the County List and Drogheda in the Branch List,... See more<br />
<br />
Then select B for Abaile<br />
<br />
You can vote once per day per email address. So if you have several email addresses please place a vote for each one. And it costs you nothing.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-90551289460385947562010-02-01T12:24:00.000+00:002010-02-01T12:24:54.554+00:00Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus!!Todays sermon ladies and gentleman is a bit of a delicate subject, recently I have been experiencing difficulties in my marriage, you see once upon a time girl meets boy decides to settle down and get married and have children and everything will be blissfully happy right? Wrong! I am ashamed to say that before I had my children I took pity on parents of special needs children, how awful a life if you could call it that did they have with these children. I never for one moment thought that I would be in the same position as they were but here I am and I now hate to see the pitying looks you get when your child has a meltdown or has difficulties at school, the smiles that don't quite meet the eyes or worse the ones who cross the road to avoid having to deal with you at all! Its hard enough to get other people to understand it let alone your partner in all of this. This definitely can separate even the strongest of marriages, you have two choices, either you pull together and be stronger as a result of the challenge ahead of you or you fall apart and go in opposite directions.<br />
Unfortunately it is usually the mother who ends up doing most for the child or children with special needs and the dad gets the verbal bits of what is being done to help them but we need support in order to keep us going and fight the battles that need to be fought. I am not sure if men in general get that we need someone strong and supportive that we can lean on when times get tough for us, in my case my hubbie is a wonderful dad but I am not sure he GETS IT, I think some men find it very difficult to cope with accepting that their child is different and almost go around with blinkers on until something comes to hit them over the head and it dawns on them that all is not ok. Mothers instinct is to nature and nurture and men just tag along for the ride.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><img border="0" kt="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoXxI3xrpF3_JA6ta7PWt3pRfV5r2fhY0obhGV4-oboLPBCMMkYu1izW1hh5zepaXydS9VIynJhPjXqn6qXyr7OTGQCaRmefsBqD34q0UN_06hBAjpJnK3hkoaXDyM0oiM5aszoPlNoZk/s320/292.png" /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Why is it that things have to be pointed out to them before they realise that something needs to be done surely its not that difficult to pick up on that you need help and support and a shoulder to cry one when things get a bit bumpy along the way. Well as this blog says they are from Mars and need that gentle nudge ( or big kick) to realise that things are not all that they seem. Marriage is tough enough without having special needs kids thrown into the mix which can stretch a relationship to breaking point and make you want to pull your hair out in frustration.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div align="left" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKWZfj-5_ZmvFu0edAYbX21DY69AI8Xs1lHz15WDyeSyIFuG1u0nauU_sbDwmSq7Zoz_v2dNHE31YWqNxMotM87zdVz_Xki9getDJo0YvMaLlsRkQIb3pz3NAQ9EbPuzNPdB4tlLPhCWs/s1600-h/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" kt="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKWZfj-5_ZmvFu0edAYbX21DY69AI8Xs1lHz15WDyeSyIFuG1u0nauU_sbDwmSq7Zoz_v2dNHE31YWqNxMotM87zdVz_Xki9getDJo0YvMaLlsRkQIb3pz3NAQ9EbPuzNPdB4tlLPhCWs/s320/images.jpg" /></a></div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">However we plod along willing to give it a go and make the best situation we can for our children, not everyone will survive their relationship and some will probably be better off for that, we all have tough times and hit rocky patches, some people will have them more than others and some are lucky that they are strong enough to survive whatever stands in their way, I plan to be the one who survives anything that stands in my relationships way but that doesn't mean it will be easy, oh no I expect lots of pitfalls along the way, and plenty of kicks up the backside for himself to remind him to GET IT!!!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div align="left" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-70368314417512010712010-01-24T20:46:00.002+00:002010-01-24T21:15:08.612+00:00Seven things about me!Well here goes nothing, all my esteemed bloggers have blurted out there seven things so I will embark on the same mission. I warn you all it may be extremely boring as I live such a dull and sheltered life lol.<br /><br /><br />1. I have a dread of being late for anything, this has been a major blight in my life as if I am<br /> even a minute late I break out into a cold sweat which gets progressively worse the later I<br /> get.<br /><br />2. I once foolishly went skinny dipping in Majorca in the middle of the night while very pissed<br /> with my friend and two guys we met, I got out in the middle of the bay in Santa Ponsa and<br /> promptly got stung by a jellyfish!! It was not a thing to be repeated.<br /><br /><br />3. I have a absolutely crippling fear of Piers as a result of my dad nearly backing the car off one<br /> down in Wexford, I actually get out of the car if we have to go on one and I am so paranoid I<br /> take the children with me.<br /><br /><br />4. This will be hard to believe but a guy I used to go out with threatened to commit suicide when<br /> I broke up with him, he is alive and well to this day!<br /><br /><br />5. I used to be a solo singer in the choir in School, I also did drama and was in productions in my<br /> locality.<br /><br /><br />6. I have a very high pain threshold, I know this because when I was in labour with my first<br /> child they kept offering me a epidural and I refused, after 24 hours they were amazed I<br /> never asked for it and told me that they could count on one hand the amount of women who<br /> turned it down!<br /><br /><br />7. Finally I am fiercely loyal to my friends and would do anything to protect them, however I<br /> hate to be made a fool of and find it very hard to forgive someone for doing it.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-6821854888829343342010-01-23T22:19:00.002+00:002010-01-23T22:45:58.279+00:00Autism AngelsRecently I have been feeling a bit overwhelmed by the whole Autism, Aspergers diagnosis of my children, I had hit a big speedbump in the road and couldn't find my way over it. Luckily a Autism angel came to my rescue and kindly offered me the chance of attending the We will Rock you Show in the O2 today. It literally brought me back to life, to be able to take joy in something and see others feel the same way felt wonderful. My Autism Angel knows who she is, she is the angel for so many of us and the one person we look up to in times of crisis and despair.<br />While we were watching the show my mind was creating this blog, this show was all about a pair of outcasts who dared to step out of the status quo and do their own thing and look for a different way of doing things, does this sound familiar to any of you? I know it certainly resonated our children's differences for me, In the end they overcome their struggle and conquer the world who tried to make them fit in and conform, everyone cheered and clapped, why can't it be like this in the real world when our kids try to do this?<br />Of course this is make believe, a show for entertainment but it does happen in real life everyday for our kids, they fight to conform in order to fit in so that they won't appear abnormal to the neurotypical world and we try hard to prepare them for this because we are conscious of how cruel the world at large can be.<br />I find myself cheering at the one's who stand out of the crowd, they walk to their own beat and bang their own drum, yes they try to fit in but stand out sufficiently to be extraordinary and follow their own path. I say thankgod for diversity and all it brings with it!!<br /><br />I had five Angels with me today and I enjoyed their company very much, you all know who you are. I think we are all fortunate to have met our Angels here on Earth to watch over us.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-2127082139754696662010-01-18T14:20:00.002+00:002010-01-18T14:49:20.977+00:00Has history taught us nothing?My mind is racing today as I have come from a very long meeting involving one Principal and two teachers in my daughters school. My head is pounding and my heart is racing from all that both they and I had to take in this morning. You see today I went to the school to go about getting my daughter the intervention and resource hours she needs to help her achieve her full potential in a mainstream setting, this is no mean feat as the Principal and I are not on the same wavelength, the resource teacher is a dote and wants to help in anyway possible and her classroom teacher resembles Barbie in every way possible and has a bit of dopey thrown in for good measure!!<br />I hand over copies of the report from the infamous Prof to each of them and wait for responses to be given, the principal's response is to tell me I need a letter from my GP stating she is on meds for ADHD as that is the only way that the SENO will take it seriously, he then informs me that he is not hopeful of her getting her resource hours as he has had two cases worse than her refused recently, my heart sinks I have to start another battle just like I had to with Kyle only this one seems tougher to me due to the cutbacks in place.<br />The dote of a resource teacher wants to help in any way possible and says he will speak to the principal about the possibility of having a half a hour one to one lesson with her every day. I could kiss this man, he enquires after my well being and remarks it must be tough having two children on the spectrum, I nod my head afraid that if I respond to his kindness I will dissolve into tears, he knows this of course and gently touches me on the arm as if to say "I understand and its ok"<br />The Barbie doll has to be told what way to teach my child so therefore I go in armed with a copy of the Dept of Eds recommendations on how to teach a child with a learning disability, she looks at me in shock and nearly falls off the chair in surprise, I think she assumes I must have a learning disability as well as she treats me as if I have not got a brain in my head, well today she had her eyes opened!! No more Mrs nice guy.<br />The one thing that struck me about these encounters was when I posed the question to the principle as to what would happen to children in mainstream whose hours were taken off them or the sna's removed. He said it would pose a serious dilemma for schools as to how they would be able to teach them, He said the Dept were clamping down on resource hours and eventually wanted them gone altogether as well as the sna's. I said to him surely this is consigning children like mine to the scrapheap and he nodded his head sadly.<br />Now this is where the history bit in the title comes in, it strikes me that like Hitler wanting a super race this also goes for the Dept of Education! They want children who have blonde hair and blue eyes and brains to burn in their schools, not for them are the children who are just as bright but have difficulties in expressing their potential in a conventional way in our society. We all know of the practise of some schools CHERRYPICKING their students, they wheedle out the weakest link without so much as a by or leave, thats what the entrance exam is there for. I find myself questioning what life would be like with all these blonde haired perfect children and the answer is simply this, AUTOMATED! Who wants to be perfect anyway? Not me.<br />I am not going to allow anyone consign my children to the scrapheap or to be extinguished like in the holocaust just because the powers that be want everyone to conform and be a super race so I will continue my fight for my children's rights and pray to god to give me the strength to do it.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-27453675120032177322010-01-14T13:10:00.002+00:002010-01-14T13:30:25.824+00:00The need for sameness!While I sit here relaxing with my third cup of tea today, I am aware of the silence that surrounds me and how much I like it. I now have finally been able to despatch my children off to school and all that remains is a delicious silence and emptiness in the house and it made me realise how much I value that sameness in the days that the children are being educated.<br />Let me explain, our children need routine in order to get them from A to B without any interruptions or meltdowns, we all follow certain patterns in order to avoid any un-necessary hiccups along the way and hope there isn't any change in events that would cause a major bump in the road for them.<br />However we too have this desire for sameness, we all breathed a sigh of relief at getting them back to school, we follow routines every day ourselves, we bring them to school, we collect them, we do homework with them, make dinner etc. We all follow a set pattern with one difference between them and us, they need help to transition into their routines whereas we can cope with curveballs thrown at us and not throw a major wobbly over it, yes it might be a inconvienence to us but nothing we can't handle.<br />Take me for example, when they go to school I do not have a shred of noise in the house, no tv is put on, no radio, I have to have complete silence in order to preserve my sanity before the onslaught begins when they return. This has become very important to me but if it was shattered briefly I would be able to cope, this is not the case for our children. I now have a finer appreciation for children that go around with their hands up to their ears because they cannot filter out the noise that comes at them, I get where they are coming from and how distracting that must be for them. I also get the fact of why they act up if routines are not in place because I too can be upset if something crops up out of the blue.<br />Today I waved two very happy little children off to school pleased that not only where they going back to routine but I was as well and oh how happy that made me!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-4050132565476892242010-01-12T13:47:00.002+00:002010-01-12T14:13:17.560+00:00And so the fight beginsI now had school to contemplate for our little man, he was going to be five shortly and ready for the next step of his life, however this was not going to be easy and clearcut like it is with most parents this was going to be one of many battles that I would have to fight for him. The Prof had said he thought he was a suitable candidate for mainstream school but only with the presence of a full time sna. I approached the school and they were very good in telling me what I needed to get from the hse in order to prove his needs and strengthen our case for a sna.<br />In the middle of all of this he was referred in Beechpark Services where they did his assessment of need and also where Hubbie and I did the Early Bird Program. It was only when we got here that I realised the full extent of what we were dealing with. The other parents at the course were just as bewildered and distraught as we were and I realised we were not alone. All of our children had varying degrees of Autism and it was quickly pointed out by the team that our little man was what they called the mildest in the group. I thought well try being at home with him 24 hours a day and maybe you would change your minds instead of the half an hour observing him once every couple of weeks! I was made feel as if he was so mild it was of no consequence and could be managed so therefore don't bother us, well I wasn't having that and said as much which went down like a lead balloon, we then were told that because he was going to mainstream school he wouldn't be eligible for their services and basically there's the door don't let it hit you on the backside on your way out. We were left in the wilderness with no-where to turn, what do we do now? Our only alternative was to get his interventions privately, he needed Slt and Ot by the bucketload, the list of things wrong with him multiplied when we received the assessment of need report, I no longer look at them because he still is my little boy that I love and all the labels he now has does not define who or what he is.<br />We are fortunate we are in a position to provide what Kyle needs but other people out there are not and they are at the mercy of the HSE and their local health boards as to whether their children get help or not. For some it depends on where you live, some counties provide the services through the health board and some do not, I have heard of incidents where families uproot themselves just to get their child the help they need and move miles away from family and friends. Some are lucky enough to get their children into outreach programs and asd units in mainstream schools and other are really fortunate in getting their children into Asd Schools specifically catering for children with Autism. The rest of us are not so lucky and a lot of children end up in mainstream with no intervention what-so-ever other than the resource hours their diagnosis qualifies them for. Its a constant battle for parents no matter what option is available to them and one I am prepared fight tooth and nail in order to help my son and daughter achieve their fullest potential in life.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-91271126635725629762010-01-06T22:11:00.000+00:002010-01-06T22:11:39.453+00:00The perfect storm.: Sex and the City.<a href="http://andra-theperfectstorm.blogspot.com/2010/01/sex-and-city.html">The perfect storm.: Sex and the City.</a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-76733810028549999202010-01-06T13:30:00.002+00:002010-01-06T15:00:32.076+00:00Sex and the City.I was watching a re run of Sex and the City last night and it struck me that our Fb group are all similiar in ways of the characters in this program. Some are more reserved like Charlotte, some are more blatant like Samantha, others are more cautious like Miranda and all of us are hiding behind a computer like Carrie! Carrie goes through life pondering on love, life and all the things that goes with it and we do the same although the love aspect is directed towards our children in our cases and not some fantastic Mr Big!!<br />We ponder on our children's future and happiness and how we can find their full potential, but most of all we wonder how they will find their way in this world. This world is bold and brash just like Samantha and some of our little ones will be frightenened in experiencing this world, the key is to be able to get them to work around it and learn to live with it as best they can. All we parents can do is give them the tools with which to learn and give them love and encouragement to be brave and face the future head on.<br />I feel when I write these blogs I am just like Carrie Bradshaw, alright who am I kidding I am not a skinny goddess but I am pondering on love and life just like she does and also have a great affinity for shoes!!<br />I wonder are we afraid to face the future head on unlike our children who try new experiences when we least expect them too, do we do the same as they do, no we don't because we know better, we have learned fear of the unknown and therefore don't put ourselves in harms way. Our children learn from example so maybe we should all take a leaf out of their books and have a leap of faith and face the future with courage and not fear and trepidation of what is to come. Maybe just like Carrie who is hopeful and takes chances on love we should do the same and start the new year with hope and love in our hearts, after all what goes around comes around so here's hoping that love and hope wings its way to us all this year.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-73435379736486958232009-12-29T23:02:00.002+00:002009-12-29T23:21:35.847+00:00The floodgates openPicture the scene, we are in a shed at the bottom of the Prof's garden nervously waiting for him to arrive, Kyle is on the floor trying to open some sort of dolls house and Gary and I are nervous and avoiding all unnecessary conversation. Suddenly he arrives and he ushers us into a room that has walls covered from floor to ceiling with books and pieces of paper everywhere. Kyle sits on Gary's knee and in the hour that we were there he never so much as moved or spoke, its almost as if he knew why we were there. We were asked family history and backround, he then took out a list of questions and with quick fire sucession we were bombarded with them until we were almost dazed by it. A hour had passed by and finally he got up and reached for a pile of literature and calmly handed them to me, I looked down at them and the word AUTISM in big bold letters jumped off the page at me, for a while I was bewildered, we got up to leave and I asked him when could we expect his report and his diagnosis to which he replied 'well my diagnosis I can tell you now, it is autism your son has although it is mild'. His report was to follow a week later.<br />We got into the car not uttering a word, we didn't even look at one and other, it was as if we looked at each other it would become real and we would crumble. It was a very long silent journey home, at one point we passed the Brainwave office on the Crumlin Road which we are members due to Kyle's epilepsy and I said to Gary 'I am going to have to join the IAA now as if it isn't bloody enough to be involved in there as well'. The look of horror on his face said it all and the realisation of what we were facing dawned on us.<br />We reached my parents house to collect Lauren and when we went in my mother just looked at us and said 'well' to which I replied 'It is what we thought it was' the blood visibily drew from her face and I could see the tears well up in her eyes and it was too much to bear, it was like I had drawn out and given her the hardest slap in the face I could possibly have given. I quickly gathered the children up and made a excuse to go home and ran into the car where the floodgates opened. The tears didn't stop for a long time but when they did that was when my fight began.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-85306423726351362062009-12-23T12:05:00.002+00:002009-12-23T12:23:52.037+00:00I count my blessings<strong></strong><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAvkTKBnBG45sY_6To8Gc-EHf1zU1qA1p7d6z8rxivCyrDXyZOIUWHXHavKgzA33SkAHSCIAq8eoDolXFuO8z9VqBTcJSz4ZclD5ljDbB2jKrYc9OrZ-zQifh7sUPkfH1q7ylomH8Oif0/s1600-h/011.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 243px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5418402322044886098" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAvkTKBnBG45sY_6To8Gc-EHf1zU1qA1p7d6z8rxivCyrDXyZOIUWHXHavKgzA33SkAHSCIAq8eoDolXFuO8z9VqBTcJSz4ZclD5ljDbB2jKrYc9OrZ-zQifh7sUPkfH1q7ylomH8Oif0/s320/011.JPG" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br />As I type this today my son is quietly watching ben 10 in his pjs albeit with a heavy head cold and my daughter is out playing in whats left of the snow. I am still in my pyjamas and all is right with the world for now. Today I got up and thought what have I to be thankful for this Christmas? You see there are so many more people out there worse off than us, they may be struggling financially or not have their health or worse still have a terminally ill child and be facing into a bleak Christmas and New Year. Even though it has been a tough year for us with two children diagnosed on the Autistic Spectrum we have a lot to be thankful for, our children are healthy and happy and in a family that loves them for who they are and what they will become. We are by no means wealthy but are comfortable enough to give them a roof over their heads and food in their stomach and a safe loving warm environment.<br />It struck me that the thing I was most thankful for this year was my fb Autie friends, you see they have been my salvation at the times I needed support and help the most. I have laughed with them, cried with them and shared my inner most thoughts with them as they have done with me! I feel TRULY blessed to each and every one of them come into my life indirectly through my children. You see the diagnosis of my children have led me to this very special group with which I share the highs and lows of my life and they don't judge me as they walk in the same shoes as I do. To all of you I wish you all a very heartfelt happy Christmas and a Happy New Year and I hope next year will be better for all of us and no matter what I will be there for all of you just as you have been there for me. Much love to you all. xxxUnknownnoreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-77577255711438538972009-12-20T21:30:00.002+00:002009-12-20T21:53:54.592+00:00Light at the end of the tunnelWe now had to adjust ourselves to a life of constant monitoring and medication to be given twice daily and somehow we adapted to this way of life and it became our "norm". This was not to be the last seizure Kyle would have as on the 22nd of December 2006 he had the worst one to date and we were on the merrygoround again. Fate was smiling on us that day as luckily a very good neurologist from Crumlin had his clinic in Tallaght hospital that day and Kyle's paedatrician requested to see him so he could examine Kyle. Thankgod he did because that was the day this fantastic man took over Kyle's case and we haven't looked back since, it was also the day that Kyle had his last seizure so we are now celebrating him being three years seizure free on Tuesday.<br />We began to realise that more than epilepsy was going on with our son, his speech was very poor, he had lots of words but could not put them into sentences, his balance was clumsy and he always banged into things and he dropped everything in sight. We decided to go to a speech therapist to see what was going on and she very calmly told us he needed a educational assessment to see how much he understood. This was a blow but we duelly did what she said and went for the assessment.<br />This was to be a very difficult task for Kyle and in the end he could not be tested as she felt he didn't understand what was being asked of him, I don't know what happened me during that time but it was like a lightbulb went off in my head and I blurted out "Do you think he is autistic" She looked at me and said well thats not for me to say but things can be done for autism and its not the worst thing in the world. She may as well have come out and said it and as we got into the car I faced my husband who was shellshocked and said Our child is autistic, we sat in silence on the way home and as soon as I got there I went straight onto the internet to look up Autism, lots of thing hopped out of the computer at me and I realised Kyle ticked a lot of boxes. My heart sank, its bad enough that the poor little thing has epilepsy but dear god Autism as well, This was just too much to bear and I retreated into myself, barely functioning I started on the round of speech therapy while we waited for a assessment from the eminent Prof Fitzgerald. We got it sooner than we expected and before we knew it we found ourselves in a garden shed at the bottom of his garden, This was to be a experience and one that I will not forget.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-4037308775331982272009-12-17T12:09:00.002+00:002009-12-17T12:33:25.110+00:00Darkest momentsMy story with Kyle was just beginning as we waited to hear what was wrong with our perfect boy, the mri and scan showed nothing so they performed a lumbar puncture to rule out meningitis, God I can still hear him screaming having that done, it took two doctors and two nurses to hold him down to do it. We spent eight long days in hospital with him being given antibiotics through a drip every six hours, his poor hands were destroyed from where he tryed to get the "Freddie" out, he hated it. We were told that they couldn't find anything wrong and to go home and it would probably never happen again, how wrong they were five weeks later it happened again, he was asleep in his cot and I heard the scream and ran he, he was blue around the mouth and I started shaking him to try and wake him, another ambulance ride to the hospital and straight into ICU. I was beside myself and was actually physically sick that this was happening again. Everytime Kyle went asleep he had a seizure and they lasted six to seven mins each, that night he had eleven seizures and he was eventually sedated to give his poor little body a rest. That was the longest night of my life and as we waited for the consultant to see us the next day a fear was building inside me. The words that the doctor had said to me when I lost my baby came back to bite me in the ass, "better to lose a child now than have a severely disabled child later on" I could hear them ringing in my ears, was this the situation I now found myself in?<br />The Consultant came in and said I have to tell you your child has epilepsy and its so severe that he will need medication to control it and also medication to stop a seizure if he has more of them! He told me Kyle was classed as a medical emergency and that if any seizure lasted more than five minutes he was to brought into the hospital. I barely listened after that, all I could think of was please just get out of this room and leave me alone before I break down, I think he could sense my despair and left. Kyle was in his buggy and was smiling up at me and my heart was breaking for him, I asked my dad to bring him for a walk that I needed to be by myself for a while so he did what I asked, as soon as he left the corridor I shut the door and fell to the floor and howled, I wailed so loudly the nurses ran in to see what was going on and found me curled up in a ball in the corner of the room. A big mug of very sweet tea was produced and I was gently put on a chair and left alone.<br />That day it felt like my perfect child died and I was given a changeling in his place, I could barely bring myself to look at him. I felt this was my fault, my fault for not wanting a boy in the first place so I was in some way being punished. My fault that I didn't produce a perfect child, I believe in Karma and I thought I had done something really awful to someone or something to have my child deserve such a fate. I descended into despair and self pity. All our lives had changed that day, little did we know that this was just the beginning of the Storm.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-54764901074538702292009-12-16T16:33:00.002+00:002009-12-16T16:55:08.084+00:00Its life Jim but not as we know it!!Kyle was a very placid baby, he slept when he was supposed to, fed when he was hungry and hardly ever cryed. I thought that his perfect temperament was a reward from God for putting up with having a very difficult child beforehand. Two and a half years of bliss with him ensured, he was such a joy to have, it never occurred to us that his speech wasn't age appropriate, that he walked at seventeen months in comparison to Lauren at ten months, he was just our perfect child and we felt blessed.<br />However our bliss was shortlived as at the age of two and half while getting ready for bed in our room he suddenly let out a earsplitting scream, it was almost inhuman, his eyes started to roll and he started to foam at the mouth, dear god what was going on with my beautiful boy, we immediately called a ambulance and then my parents to look after Lauren while we quickly bundled him into the ambulance and sped off towards Tallaght hospital.<br />I will never forget that journey, all sorts of things ran through my mind. He arrived into a and e and was admitted that night for observation, they thought it was viral and he would be fine so I left to come home and my husband stayed with him, I had to get Lauren to school the next day and the plan was to go to the hospital straight afterwards, however this plan failed as at six in the morning I got a frantic call from Gary to say it had happened again and to come immediately. <br />I dressed myself not really knowing if the right clothes went on the right places and ran like a banshee from my parents house with my dad hot on my heels, we raced to the hospital and within five minutes of me being there it happened again, I was beside myself, all sorts of possibilities were being thrown out there by the doctors, could be meningistis, could be brain tumour we are going to do a mri and a cat scan to see whats going on, he will be sedated for the next while to stop the seizures. I watched as they took my baby down to the theatre with me running after his bed, he looked so small and helpless with tubes everywhere and I realised we were in for a very harrowing time.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-48768845884565863592009-12-14T12:39:00.000+00:002009-12-14T12:52:07.040+00:00Part two.The following morning I woke up in hospital with the words from the doctor the night before haunting me, 'there was obviously something severely wrong with your baby and its better that this happened now rather than deal with a disabled child later on' I didn't care what the baby would have had I still wanted my child and nothing was going to bring my baby back. I left with a heavy heart that ached for what could have been and prepared myself to greet the healthy child I already had. She didn't understand why Mummy was so sad, I finally decided I needed to kick myself up the backside and get on with it.<br />The docs recommended getting pregnant again straight away and thats pretty much what happened, I didn't dare allow myself to hope that this baby would stay put and worried constantly. This pregnancy however was text book, everything was perfect and due to my previous difficulties a c.section was planned because they would not risk me going into labour. <br />Five weeks before the birth I found out I was expecting a boy, I have to be honest and say I was dissapointed, I always saw myself as a mother of girls not boisterous energetic boys. I tried to get excited but failed miserably, of course my husband was thrilled as all men usually are when they know they have a son.<br />The fateful day finally came and I was gowned up and this time walked into the operating theatre, that was such a different experience to the first time and one I didn't like because I could see all the instruments fully and I began to wail with nerves, after what seemed like a eternity Kyle made his appearance into the world, he was the image of his sister and had a shock of jet black hair, well of course that explained the awful heartburn I had!! He was perfect, all seven pounds seven ounces of him and I fell in love all over again.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5675152692946265075.post-26435789427838189842009-12-14T10:16:00.000+00:002009-12-14T10:39:41.679+00:00I can't believe I am joining the ranks of my distinguished fellow bloggers but here goes nothing. This blog starts at the beginning of my journey into motherhood. Shortly after getting married in 1999 I fell pregnant, I had wanted to have a baby so much but the pregnancy that followed was marred with sickness and eventual bed rest from five months in until the day our precious daughter was delivered. Nothing about this pregnancy or birth was conventional, the day finally arrived for the birth as I was scheduled for a induction only to find I had gone into labour naturally anyway, I was hooked up to monitors for baby's heartbeat as she had gone into distress, 24 long hours later and a host of nurses and doctors burst into the room and announced that I would need a emergency c.section, the baby was fine but I wasn't doing so well, before I knew where I was I was lying on the operating table and Lauren was delivered in six minutes flat, it was the longest six minutes of my life and as I lay there listening to her cry and my husband saying its a girl I shook my head in disbelief and pure exhaustion. She was finally here and so my story begins. <br />Lauren was not a easy baby, in fact she had reflux and cried constantly, she was never out of my arms and had to be rocked for hours to get to sleep. My parents babysat for us one night and when we came back they shoved her into my arms and literally ran from the house as if she was a demon possessed. As time went on the reflux settled and she thrived but still she was constantly in my arms needing attention, I fell into depression and needed help and was promptly marched to the doctor when I ended up banging my head off the wall in frustration and exhaustion. Things got better for me after that but Lauren never gave me a chance, she was so active and walked at ten months, crawling just wasn't for her, she talked early too. She had daddy wrapped around her little finger. <br />Three years passed by and I had this clingy but beautiful little girl, I didn't want anymore children as she literally had put me off for life but my husband was a only child and he didn't want her to be on her own so I relented and agreed to have another baby, I fell pregnant quickly and allowed myself to get excited all over again, twelve weeks in and I got sick, a very sore throat and cough so I decided to go to the doctor, she confirmed my pregnancy and gave me antibiotics so I went home and went to bed, about a hour later I got up and went to the bathroom with unbearable pain and realised I was losing my precious baby, A emptyness hit me and we rushed to the hospital, as I waited to see the heartbeat on the scan I knew something wasn't right, the doctor looked at me and said 'are you sure of your dates' then I knew there was a problem, I said yes and she said well the scan is showing up at five weeks, a lot of pregnancies fail in the fifth week and there is no heartbeat. A black mist descended over me and I felt I had failed my husband, I kept apologising to him over and over again, how could this happen? We already had one healthy child, what was going on. I was sent home and had a full miscarriage and ended up back in hospital that night with my sister for company. It was her thirthieth birthday and we had lost my baby and her future niece or nephew on that day. Even now when her birthday arrives I descend into despair and wonder about what could have been.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com8